Team Nature’s Path Racing Blog

The cold iron bars were just a little too close together.  Try as I might, I could not squeeze through.

Eventually the guard brought a filthy bowl full of gruel.  While he watched expressionlessly, I toyed with the gruel, even used the cracked plastic spoon to take a sip of the nasty stuff.  Evidently bored, he turned away and shuffled down the hall, headed for the Tax Library.  Lots of thrills down there.

As the guard grew more distant the sound of his shuffling diminished.  I quickly stripped and rubbed the stinking gruel across my chest and shoulder blades.  Thus lubricated, I again tried to slip between the bars.  I pushed until my chest jammed against the metal, then forced my way further.  I winced as chest hairs were stretched and slowly torn out.  Exhaling to reduce my cross section, I pushed again and my skin scraped against the cold bar.  Centimeter by centimeter I was getting through, though leaving behind substantial quantities of epidermal cells.

With a sudden scrape I was through.  I reached back into the cell, grabbed my clothes and ran, hoping the guard was fully engaged in the consolidated income tax regulations.

*****

At 5:30pm in West Creek, I lifted the machine from the trunk rack.  The official Team Nature’s Path Blue Train was scheduled to roll at 6:00pm, so there was time for a warm-up lap.  Halfway through I saw Des streak past in the opposite direction.  I waved but he didn’t see me.

After one lap at a casual pace, I turned in at the Direct Buy building to find Dan, occasional dungeon co-resident, ready to roll.  We chatted briefly, then headed out together.  On the next lap Des caught up to us, and together we encountered and overtook Tom.  We four then rode in a tight pace line, holding a consistent 18 – 24 inches between the rear wheel of one bike and the front wheel of the next.

As we passed Direct Buy again on the next lap Pascal rolled out and joined us.  With five of us in the pace line the labor force increased by 25%, and we sped along at a higher velocity.  We passed other cyclists, some alone and some in groups.  Down the hill, across the lake and up the next incline, we maintained a steady 23 mph.  I was tiring, but hanging on despite the much faster than normal pace for me.

By consensus we slowed as we began the next lap.  Dan and I rode side by side, and I made a few admiring comments about his slick Cervelo.

“When I STOMP on it the carbon frame reacts immediately. I’ll show you. Let’s pick up the pace again. Watch this!”

The muscles in his quads bunched, the Cervelo surged forward, then rider and bike suddenly blurred around the edges.  Moments later I heard a distinct popping sound as he vanished in a puff of blue smoke.  He briefly reappeared 50 meters ahead, then vanished again, reappearing yet again beyond that.  I’ll need to consult with Stephen Hawking, but I believe Dan and the Cervelo may have been skipping in and out of the multidimensional space time continuum….or something like that.